Liberal Women Confused After Still Having Their Reproductive Rights, Unsure What To Protest
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Progressive activists were left stunned and disoriented this week after discovering that their reproductive rights had not, in fact, been stripped away overnight.
“I woke up, checked my phone, and realized I could still make my own medical decisions,” said Brooklyn resident Skylar Moon-Fernández, holding a protest sign that now simply read ‘???’. “I was like… so what do I scream about today?”
Some protesters attempted to march anyway but could only chant vague slogans like “We’re Mad About Something!” and “Probably the Patriarchy, IDK!” before wandering off for oat milk lattes.
Experts warn that without a fresh outrage cycle, liberal activists may be forced to spend time on hobbies, employment, or even family dinners.
